eisschirmchen:

marshofsleep:

absolutrash:

marshofsleep:

briichigo:

Someone make something.
SOMA GO!

i needed to write comedy for a second.

---

The only reason they exchanged numbers was because he kept locking himself out and didn’t have anyone to give a back-up key to. It was awkward– she had been checking her mail in the lobby, and there he was, tenant 564, mister ‘hey can I ask you a huge favor, here’s my number.’

Admittedly, it had been a good move on both their parts– she was almost always home whenever he locked himself out, which was at least once a month, and he has repaid her in copious amounts of Deathbucks gift cards that his mother keeps sending him for some reason. Life is pretty good for her, or at least well caffeinated. He has another card for her this evening.

“It’s pumpkin spice season,” he says, unceremoniously handing her the gift card while still looking at one of his bills.

“Thanks. Why are you so bad at keys?” she asks, tucking the card into her back pocket.

564 shrugs. “Place I lived before, someone was always home. Anyway. Night.”

Maka waves and tries to ignore the stretch of his shirt between his shoulder blades as he walks up a flight of stairs.

Anyway, none of this matters– not his shoulders, not the casual warmth of his fingers when he hands her gift cards, not even the fact that she has a key to his apartment. What matters is that he has her phone number, and it’s while she’s settling in with a book in bed on a Tuesday evening that she gets a text at a quarter to eleven.

[[i can hear u using ur vibrator every night]]

Her lungs seize, but then she remembers she hasn’t turned on a vibe in weeks– the batteries are dead, she recalls with a grimace. He must be mistaken. The only thing in her apartment that vibrates apart from her phone is her toothbrush. Regardless, who the hell just texts a person with that information?!

To make matters worse, 564 adds [[if u ever want an actual person 2 do the job, im rite next door]]

Blushing furiously and ignoring the excited lurch in her heart, she replies, [[excuse me?? WTF are you talking about??]]

[[the walls r thin. i can hear the buzzing every night. clockwork. u keep a good schedule]]

Maka screams. She thinks she hears a muffled laugh on the other side of the wall.

She slowly speaks the words out loud as she types [[that’s my electric toothbrush you idiot!]]

The silence on the other side of the wall is gratifying, and she puffs up her chest with pride. “Stupid!” she shouts, but then her phone buzzes.

[[o. well, offer still stands]]

[[I am not unlocking your door next time!]]

Wednesday evening, she runs into him at the lobby mailboxes, as usual. He keeps a good schedule too, apparently. Maka doesn’t greet him so much as glare at him over the open door of her mailbox cubby.

564 has the decency to be flushing as red as his necktie – why in the seven hells is he wearing a suit and why must it be so exquisitely tailored – and doesn’t even bother with his mailbox. Instead, he faces her with his hands in his pockets and clears his throat.

“FiveSixFive, uh. So, I may have had alcohol last night–” He winces when Maka slams the mailbox door. “Anyway, sorry. That was really gross of me. A-Also. Um. You have a pretty smile. So. Good job with the toothbrush.”

Maka’s face feels as though it may be catching up with his. “Oh. Thank… you?” she squeaks.

He takes a big breath, shoulders inching high, and mumbles a hurried, “Okbye,” before whirling around and heading towards the stairs.

“FiveSixFour,” Maka blurts, covering half her burning face with coupon packs and takeout menus. Her neighbor turns around, trying very hard to not look like he’s waiting for a deathblow of some kind.

She says, “I’m Maka. I don’t drink, but I like coffee on Saturdays?”

A faint smile slowly blooms across his face. “It’s pumpkin spice season,” he tries, a little hopeful.

“Yeah.”

“I’m Soul,” he says. “I’m right next door.”

Yes. She’s very aware of that.

@marshofsleep sorry my hand slipped bC THIS WAS JUST TOO CUTE

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I COULDN’T RESIST OKAY that story is fun and a little adorable with these two dorks and Maka is absolutely lovely in that drawing FLAILS 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA